Recently, a good friend of mine “turned up pregnant” – she’s still in the first three months, so I promised to write down a list of things for her that I thought she’d need to know, or that would be helpful. Being pregnant my own self, its taken me about six weeks to do, and I decided to post it here to see if anyone else had anything (constructive) to add. So here we go.
The best thing I did was to buy one book, and one book only – the Mayo Clinic Guide to a Healthy Pregnancy. If you’re like me, you’ll enjoy the science-y aspect of it, and you’ll appreciate that it doesn’t have the fluffy, new age-y, bs that you see in a lot of other pregnancy books. I really like that it tells the facts – even about controversial topics – and rarely uses value-judgementy language. Jason and I read it every week to see what was happening – particularly fun in the middle when there isn’t an end in sight.
The second best thing I did was to limit my looking at the internet for advice. Oh, I looked from time to time, but realized that in most of the discussions, either there was so much misinformation or judgement going on about the littlest thing – whether its what you put in your mouth to what you put on your child once its out – that it stressed me out more than I really needed to be. Also, it made me mad. (And not just because of the misinformation or judge-yness….there a LOT of moms to be out there that appear to have failed fourth grade grammar & spelling class). Try to stay away, rely on your friends, your family and your doctor.
However, when relying on friends and family, remember that the last time some of them may have had a child was before you were born, and their advice might not be…er….current. I’ve been very sick through my whole pregnancy, and my doctor prescribed a bunch of meds for me, and several older family members questioned the prescriptions. Several times. And asked if it was safe. To take meds from my OB. So….remember they might not be up to speed on the latest, AND just grind your teeth quietly and bitch to your husband. A Lot. But remember: meds can be ok. You get the sniffles, you go see that doctor!
On that note, strangers or mere accquaintances may have something to say about what you are/are not doing,and plan on telling horrible stories about their *own* pregnancy/delivery. See above (grind teeth. Bitch @ husband).
I realize on reading this that this might all sound a bit negative, but the sucktastic stuff is the stuff people don’t talk about. In fact, over the next 7-8 weeks I’m *pretty sure* I’ll be posting more advice for you as I get bigger and more irritable (than usual, anyway). However, here’s some fun things about being pregnant I want to share with you too:
- Even if you guys find out what you’re having – Don’t tell anyone. It drives people CRAZY. And if you’re like me, driving people crazy = fun!
- When you’re as pregnant as I am (32 weeks), people give you props for doing stuff you would NEVER get props for when you aren’t visibly pregnant. Today I wheeled my *very own groceries* out of the store and put them into the car and someone commented on how “active and adventurous” I am! Which is awesome, because the last time I considered myself “active AND adventurous,” Clinton was in office.
- I never need an excuse to take a nap in the middle of the day. Not even when I’ve promised to clean the house.
- I also never have to say “I’m sorry” for eating the last of the Popsicles.
- Puberty finally came to visit me at 33. I have boobs!
- You totally have a reason to redecorate a room. And remember – baby rooms do not have to be fluffy bunnies and bears. Ours has a shag rug, more stylish furniture than our own room and a solar system mobile.
- And finally, Adama is a perfectly appropriate middle name.